To Collaborative divorce or not? That is the question:

To Collaborate or not to Collaborate,

that is the question.

Many have heard about the new collaborative divorce process available in Florida and other states. The claims from attorneys who advocate for this type of law believe that the new process is cheaper, avoids the uncertainty of a court’s decision and avoids the nastiness which comes with a contested proceeding.

Cheaper?

I must debunk the notion that collaborative divorce is cheaper than a regular divorce. The filing fee for a collaborative divorce and a regular contested divorce cost the same. Each spouse hires an attorney. Each spouse has to pay the attorney. Sometimes both spouses and both attorneys meet together. It still costs each attorneys’ hourly rate to do so.  It is true that in a collaborative, you try to agree on an expert rather than hiring two, such as a CPA. You still have to pay the CPA though.   In a collaborative divorce, the emphasis is on settlement rather than litigation. That ideal certainly benefits the spouses and their children, if they have any.  Collaborative should reduce the animosity the parties experience in a contested divorce. However, a contested divorce, the parties will still attend a mediation before a trial is scheduled. Collaborative divorces also attend mediation and yes, it costs the same.

Avoids uncertainty:

Any time two spouses settle their divorce, they avoid the uncertainty of a Judge’s decision. Again, in a regular contested divorce, the parties attend mediation where settlement can occur. It all depends on the parties.

Avoids nastiness:

When two people are divorcing, clearly they have problems with each other. Requiring them to meet often in the same room with therapists, attorneys and experts, may just throw gasoline on the fire. If two married people can be civil during their divorce, there is no reason why they cannot direct their attorney to try settlement.

Bottom line:

The ultimate downside to collaborative divorces: If you fail to reach a settlement- You cannot use your attorney or experts you hired. You have wasted all that money and time. You literally start over. You and your spouse have to hire new attorneys. My goal is for the best outcome, via settlement or trial.In the 18 years of practicing law, I’ve had hundreds of divorce cases. Only 3, were truly uncontested. Those 3 couples literally agreed to each issue. The rest fell somewhere between settling or trial. The majority of the cases will settle. I don’t recommend Collaborative Divorce because ultimately it can cost you twice what a regular case costs and you have wasted the time. Divorce should be like a bandaid.  Rip it off, don’t slowly pull one hair at a time.